a mother's day post for father's day

If you don't know my mother, she is a complete control freak. So it's no wonder that she planned her pregnancy exactly one year after she married my father. She married him sixth months after they met at a party. Prior to that she turned down three proposals because she felt her suitors lacked certain qualifications to raise a proper (Catholic) family. Suitor A had a bad temper, Suitor B had a moody orthodox family, or Suitor C worked as prison psychologist. All justifiable I suppose. Typically, nothing really surprises my mother and she is always prepared, but she was thrown off guard when my father mumbled a proposal over dinner. "I couldn't understand what he was babbling about and all I wanted to do was eat my fish." I like her word choice of babble, because she always implores me to quit babbling whenever I'm expressing my emotions on full blast. I'm sure my dad's nerves were high as well.  I wonder if he had been circulating scenarios is his head: You know, interrupting dinner to get on the Hollywood knee, woo her with the question she has been waiting to hear all her life.  Or not. 

But my mother had no patience for silver screen romanticism, and wanted him to get to the point, so that she could eat her fish. Though, my mother did find my father not only charming, but much more suitable than her previous flames.  However, if marriage was now on the table, the terms would have to be negotiated. No baby until a year has passed to ensure that all parties were committed. After a year, plans would be implemented as long as it would be baptized Catholic.  My parents passed the one year milestone and I assume they began to make preparations. 

As my parents continued to plot my debut, they also scheduled a trip to Quebec to celebrate their anniversary. It would be on the New York Thruway where my mother would realize that pregnancy would follow its own schedule and arrive unannounced in spite of vigorous planning. While thrilled that she and my father succeeded, she was disappointed to learn that she would have to forgo wine with dinner while frequenting Quebec City's finest restaurants. 

P.S. my parents both abhorred this song, and totally reveled their dislike for it by rocking out to it on full volume circa 1996.